Up bloody nose with a tampon hose

I am just wraping up a miserable week of sickness. The highlight came Wednesday when my nose started dripping blood. I went to my local health clinic because pressure and ice were working. They took a normal size Tampax and stuck it up my nose. Let me tell you, nothing will knock you off your high-horse faster then having a tampon up your nose for 15 minutes.

Tonight I am doing nothing. I have to go to a party tomorrow, so I'm just chilling at home and rented the British version of "The Office." I got paid today so I am spending it in style (aka, "The Office".....oh, and a mini-pizza for myself.)

Finding a "sub" to work for me during my hours at the pre-school was a pain in the ass. I only got one person to cover me (who I have to work for next Friday), but the rest didn't even return my phonecall. Lame! It's not like we work at Olive Garden and I'm asking you to cover my section. I just need an hour. Some did lie to me because they said they were in class (we all get copies of each other schedule...they weren't). Well it's still better then "The Agency" where we had to depend on our crack HR person (and I do mean "crack") to find someone decent...which always came down to the mailroom.

Tomorrow, the baseball game will continue! (This is what I am told, hmmmm). Will I get a hit or a strike three. We shall see...(does give me a reason to get healthy faster!)

"And knowing that you would have wanted it this way,
I do believe I'm feelin' stronger every day." ~Chicago

Here's the pitch, it's a curve ball, he swings and...

foul tip! He touched the ball but it wasn't a hit. Strike two.

The night started with me dressing up in an 80's theme outfit. That was the birthday party theme. I decided to go the Miami Vice route, while everyone else went the Olivia Newton John from her music video "Physical", or a psudo "Fast Times at Richmond High" meets "Square Pegs" look. (Everyone thought they were from "the Breakfast Club".......not even close.)

Anywho, I decided to play it safe on a few levels. First, I knew about 85% of the people at the party (I had no idea I have become that big a partier, but that's a story for later), but I only told two people about the girl so I could have back-up. Smart. Then it was a matter of trying to talk to the person (Because really, you have to talk to people to get to know them.) She arrived. I waited for her to say hi to the birthday girl, and one or two friends. Then she saw me and walked over to say "hi". Then I did something smart. Nothing! No stories about me, no LA, no back-story drama, it was prefect. I was cool. So why am I calling this a strike? Well, as a stated before you can't talk to one person when two people are looking at you. She brought a friend. And they knew about 5% of the people there, and weren't as social. I brought in my friends (that were in ""the know),and introduced them, then opened up the converstion a bit. Still, it wouldn't matter. I stepped away after a while so I could socialize elsewhere. I talked to a female friend about it. The problem wasn't me (for once!!!!!!!!!), the real problem was they were bored. The party wasn't that great. They weren't really drinking, or doing much of anything. And you could see they just wanted to go home. So they did, and they gave me a ride home because I had a few, and didn't want to drive.

Which brings up the question, "I thought this girl had a crush on you?" And maybe she does, however, maybe she doesn't know what to do either. Who knows? (Well, she does. And I am talking about college kids. It's different then people outside college.) And since I have been stuck with my 102 temp, dry cough and bloody nose (a story for later) all week, I have no F*ing clue! So, my plan is to do nothing till I see the girl, and then talk to her like I would anyone else, and if something comes from it, then it will. A simple plan, but one that I hardly do...which is probably why I'm single in the first place.

Things you never want to hear in your life:The Unfunny Version!

I'm sitting in the doctor's office waiting for my lab results. The doctor walks in and before she even saids hello the first things she said to me is...

"Your white blood cell count is extremely high."

Excuse me? Couldn't you start with a "Hi" or "What up dude". I know my body is fighting the fever, but still kinda uncool. So I have slight case of Pneumonia, my temp hit 102, and all the other fun stuff. Great. The good news is I've been sitting at home doing jack shit. My homework is caught up, my next test isn't till Wednesday, and it's a basic test. So I'm not too worried. But man, daytime TV sucks ass. I haven't watch TV during the day during a normal week in many, many, many years. It sucks! And keep in mind I don't have cable!

Oh, skipping class. Classic. It's so fun to play hooky again. I love not going to school. I just wish I could go out or something, but no drinky drinky for me for at least a week.

Which brings me to my other piece of reality. Today was my first meeting of the credital program. Meaning that graduation, being a teacher, and all that stuff became very real today. This, no matter how sick I am, I had to go to (and yes, I sat very far away from everyone so it's all good.) I have a ton of paper work to do. But the good news is getting a job will be easy, I guess school districts call the college looking for people. That's good.

Tomorrow, the delayed baseball game returns. Promise!

Quarantined!

BTW, for those keeping score the title was going to be "There's the pitch, it's a foul ball, and strike two."

However, I am sick. I have been asked by the school's health center to stay off campus for the next 48 hours. I have dry cough and I lost my voice. I don't have a strep throat or mono (Thank GOD!), but I clearly have a bacterial infection.

Also, I have a midterm tomorrow, and I have been told by the teacher that I MUST take it tomorrow, she doesn't give make ups. Even though I have a doctor's note. This is a first! She could at least bring a test to the testing center and I could take in on Wednesday. Lame! And I know my study group won't want me there tonight...well, because I'm sick.

Quickly, about the original topic on-hand. It drives me crazy when people go out in groups. You can't talk to one without the other. And kids today have no concept of a "wing man." They think it's another lame superhero who has a movie coming out. But more on this topic later.

He swings, and strike one.

One must remember that "20" means "20". It doesn't matter how mature or smart "20" is because it is still "20." My own non-20 mind might be a kid at heart, heck, I can still party like I'm "20", and act like I'm "10", but sometimes I get that reminder that I am neither. I knew it was a strike when an "old person" joke was made at my expense. From there I switched to wallflower mode and just drank till I knew it was time to make my exit. Sadly, today I will be seeing more "20" all day today. So this isn't over.

On a completely different note, I know see why California can't get decent teachers. For years people think it's the money, the kids, the schools. Nope, it's becoming a teacher that kills it! Even after I get my B.A. I have to do a year of school to get my teaching credital...HOWEVER, I have learned I don't get it, I have to teach another two years after that to get my credital. So, let's take a step back and look at this. 4 years of college plus 1 credital year plus another 2 years of teaching to become a teacher equals 7 years. Now in other states, like New York, they require a teacher to have a M.A. in Education as well. So now let's add another year, that's 8! I could get a M.D, PhD, or Law Degree (jobs that all pay well over the $100,000 level minimum where teaching hits $100,000 maximum.) Our silly society just have to complicate every frickin little detail.

Back to the topic at hand. I think this just more proof that if I was to go into a serious relationship it has to be with someone over 25. Someone who has been in the real world. Still, right now it's all about the fun.

"Old man look at my life. I'm a lot like you were." ~N. Young

Bases loaded, and "you know who" is up to bat.

This has been the most stressful week I have had since starting school. The highlight was teaching German, a language I have never learned in my life so I had to do a complete crash-course on it. I have already forgotten most of it, but I remember some animal names.

The lowpoint of this week, and my entire school career happened just 11 hours ago. I got my first "D"! The entire class got D's on their papers because, according to the Professor, it was not was she was asking for. I was beside myself and went to her office to complain. The grade will stand though, and I am not very happy about this at all!!!

The highlight was the week is I learned someone has a crush on me. She already kind of knows me, which is good (she has heard my bad jokes and has seen me at my "worse", and yet she finds it entertaining.) Which now brings me to the blog topic I hate the most...past relationships (only this time, it's a good thing). I started talking to a friend of both me and "the girl", and the question of my last real relationship was brought up. I started telling the story, but by my fourth sentence I was stopped. "That's the problem" my friend said, and began to have this very enlightening talk with me about why I might be still single. And hot damn is she was right! I tend to fall too hard and too fast for people, even when warning signs are right there. Also, I take "girls" too seriously, and don't know how to have fun with it (this would be from lack of experience.) So, I asked if she thinks I should take a chance with "the girl". The response "HELL YES!"

So this weekend I have two parties I have to go to. One party is on Friday, and the other on Saturday. Both I and "the girl"(and her friends) will be going to. We share a lot of friends so I won't be alone. So the plan is "Be myself." Expect the next blog Saturday morning.

I am a boob

Probably the only piece of advice my father gave me about women was "Be a good student, because when it comes time to take a test who do you think the girls are going to want to study with." (He told me this when I was starting in high school...clearly, life took me in several different directions then what he had in mind.)

I just got an email from a girl asking how I was doing on my project. I know the girl well, but not really well. But what's worse is I have no frickin clue what project she is talking about!!! I have spent the better part of 20 minutes going over all my notes and calling a fellow student just trying to figure out what she is talking about (the student was no help either). The class isn't till Tuesday, but I feel like I am starting to get disorganized with school. I was going to do a clean job this weekend. But yesterday was a jam packed day (for a later blog), and today I just layed in bed and watch the final season of Arrested Development, which I hadn't seen yet. (The season starts off very weak, but those last 5 episodes are pure gems. Some great laughs.)

So why am I over-reacting. Because of the girl who is asking about how I'm doing...duh! ("It's always a dame" ~ H. Bogart) She is a bit of a genius, so I'll take the help. But heaven forbid if I am going to go work on a project with someone without having a clue on what I am suppose to be working on.

This just popped into my head. This is my first bit of drama this school year, and of course it's all in my mind. I guess no matter who you are (and no, "drama" is not a western culture thing, just read about Genghis Khan!) I guess drama is just a part of who you are. Not knowing what other people are thinking about you, and having all sorts of wild ideas on why they like you or hate you. And in the end, it's all about wanting acceptance by that person you really don't know too well. Weird.

Ok, back to work!!!

Playdoe! And the return of "the radar"

Here's the scenerio: The children were restless, they didn't want to go out. At the last minute, I see it out of the corner of my eye....PLAYDOE!

I don't think I've played with playdoe since I was 7 years old! I forgot the funky acidy/moist smell, the sticky mud texture, and the way it can get in your fingernails. It was awesome. It was without a doubt my shot in the arm I needed to get through this pressure cooker week. It's funny to think after next week I am 1/3 through the semester. Crazy! But for 20 minutes today, while I was working on my blue and yellow playdoe pizza, I forgot about the fact I am a college senior.

Meanwhile, something weird is going on around me. At first, I thought it was just people being freindly, but now I'm realizing something strange is happening. People are curious how I am, not so much healthwise, but what I am doing personally. If I didn't know better, I would say I am being set up...for a "hook up. In other words, I think someone out there likes me, and has told my friends (who are friends, but not super close friends), and so they are trying to find out more about me.

The friends I have made up here are good folks, but I haven't really gotten to know them too well or have they gotten to know me. It is fishey. With that said, I am dusting off my old "radar" which I haven't used in quite a number of years (really, in college you don't need one, and when you are over 10 years older then the average college kid YOU DON'T NEED ONE.) I'm curious, I am probably getting my hopes up, once again (nasty habit), but I think I am long overdue for one of these "adventures" as I call them. However, I have learned my lesson. No games, no goofy crap, or any of that silly self-destructive stuff. Just a fun time.

We'll see. Keep in mind I just played with playdoe today, so I am in a carefree mood right now!

"Hey, what's your name? Do you feel the same way too?" ~Fugazi

A weekend of concerts

Top priority of the weekend is tickets for Bridge Concert Benefit! (You can't beat this line up!)But looking at all the concerts this weekend it's going to be a tight budget weekend (luckily I have my first real payday in 2 years, 3 weeks, and 4 days oddly enough). I already have tickets to see Cheech Marin (of Cheech and Chong fame) for Saturday, but there is a fair up here and the list of band coming up here, although none are known bands, I am told that they are all top notch bands. The only ones I have heard of is "Devil makes three" and "The Rubberneckers". I look forward to it.

I also look forward to doing the one thing I have been putting up since my return from LA. Cleaning my apartment! I am a bit disgusted with it, and when I have had people over I have been ashamed. That will be my Friday (after I get my paycheck, of course!)

I think I'm over my "mind walk." Mostly because I have a shit-load of work. Next week is my first meeting regarding entering credital programs in California (so you can imagine what my blog will be about this coming Monday).

But now that I look back at my past blogs. I had to get a lot of that off my chest. My friends, I feel, don't like to hear that stuff from me because I'm known for being "goofy dude" or "papa." Sometimes I get tired of holding the crap in.

*sigh*, now I have to learn German. This Tuesday I have to teach German to my ESL class. I have never spoken German in my life (besides what I learned in Mel Brooks movies). Some of the words I will be teaching in German..."Bear, Snake, Spider, Rat" on top of actually speaking German myself.

"What is this feeling
Of power and drive
I’ve never known?
I feel alive!" ~David Hasselhoff

The human voice.

Although I communicate with my friends over the internet I tend to miss the human voice. One of the things I put in my "All Time Coolest Things People Can Do!" is to call someone on the phone just to say "Hi." Not to ask a favor, just a surprise phone call out of the blue. I think this is my one complaint about the internet. It has really seperated us a bit as people. Of course, we all have our full time lives. (For the Umpteenth time, I have had friends who got married, had babies, change carriers, and move to the far side of the country or to an entirely different country!) But that doesn't mean that you can't take ten minutes out of your life just to call someone.

The other day I got a phone call from a friend I haven't seen since May when I was in LA. She isn't one of my "inner circle" of friends, I know her because she is (actually "was" now) a waitress at my favorite Kareoke bar. She had just gotten back from Scotland and Ireland and wanted decided to get caught up with talking to friends she hasn't talk to in a while. It was very nice to share a few stories, which I can do online, but you miss that tone of excitement, happiness, and all those other wonderful emotions. After 20-25 minutes we had our goodbyes and said we would keep in touch online.

Just over two years ago, a few months before I moved, a different friend kept telling me that I should get a cell phone because everyone else has one (I had owned a cell phone since the late 90's. I just didn't have the cash.) That way I wouldn't have to wait to get to work or home to check my messages. He probably hounded my about this for serveral years about this. I called him twice back in May when I was in LA and didn't hear from him, nor have I heard from him since. As I said before, no matter how busy you are, if you want to keep in touch with someone you will find the time to do so.

Back in full college mode

Ok, after a very rough few weeks I am clearly in the mindset for college. I can say that because it is 9:45pm, I am doing my homework, and have had 4 hours of sleep the last 2 days.

Why?

Yesterday, around 8:30pm I was at a friends house talking about school stuff. I get a phone call "BRENT DENNEN IS IN TOWN." Now if you are all asking who? It would be this guy...

http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=16338693

Who was really good in concert. I guess John Mayer said in the recent Rolling Stones that this was his favorite performer currently (and I can see why!) The guy had that John Mayer/Jack Johnson singer/songwriter groove. But he had some great covers (Everything from the Police to Prince), and his solo stuff wasn't too bad either.

I've been a good boy this year. It's been the last few days where I am acting, once again, like I am 19. The bar where it was at is very much an LA style setting bar, where they decorate their dinners and overcharge. I started drinking red wine and dancing with the kids. Lots of fun by all.

The show ended at 11:30 and I walked my friend home. We hung out at her house and talked about stuff (the whole "Why are things the way they are, and why can't things change"). It ended up being 2:00am, which isn't good since I had to help open at my job at 8:00am. I got home, went to sleep, just to be awoken by my neighbor and his girlfriend (Yes, they were doing "That!").

Overall, college is kicking in with more shows coming up. Once again, I feel like 19 year old college student, one who gets tired a little more quickly, but still it's fun.

"One that fails consistently, especially a person with bad luck or poor skills"

That would be the definition of a "loser" on that title line.

As I last posted, some of my "peers" wanted to see my yearbook. And now they have. I think we all consider ourselves "dumb" when we are in high school. My joke about high school is "I wasn't a nerd. I was THEE nerd." And now I can see why.

They look at my yearbook, and the first question I get is "So where are you pictures?" "I only have the one posed pic." I respond. "Who did you date, or did any girls date you?" My response, "I didn't. Again, nerd!" After another minute they book the year book down. I picked it up to look at it. And then I was asked "So did you take any girls to homecoming or prom?" "I did to prom, but she did it as a favor to her friend, who was going with my friend at the time. And they went home around midnight." In which, they responded. "Wow, that's just sad." "Yep." I thought to myself.

I haven't looked at my yearbook since 2001 when I went to a highschool chum's wedding. High school, as I mentioned in one of my eariler posts, is a crappy place where everyone is a loser because we are just trying to act like each other...or "they" were. I just wanted to do my own thing. *ugh*, I'm in my 30's and I'm talking about high school on a blog. Geez!

The one upside, for myself anyway, is I left my hometown and moved to Cali. Over 90% of my class still lives in St. Louis. I think two famous phrases, the first is the classic line from the movie Almost Famous, "You'll meet them all again on their long journey to the middle," which is what pretty much happen to them. The second is "You can't go home again," which is true for the most part, but why would you want to. The past has passed, and the present is upon you.

That was then, this is now.

The 80's. I find it funny that the college kids look at it romantically much like my generation looked at the 60's as a cool time. Last night, I was at a party with a few friends. One of these friends has a birthday in 2 weeks and wish to have a 80's theme party. So they started quizzing me what the 80's were like. (Sadly, I promised them they can take a look at my yearbook.)

The 80's wasn't entirely Michael Jackson and John Hughes movies. When I went to prom the big dance song was Milli Vanilli. The cooler sporty kids like to do air-guitar to Living Colour's "Cult of Personality." My hair was just about the "mullet standard." Rap music was actually good. They would only play Run DMC, Salt and Peppa, and LL Cool J at dances, but at house parties it was Public Enemy, NWA, and Easy E. solo stuff. We didn't have Breakfast club characters. Lonesome rebel or depressed goth wannabe chick. We had jocks, but they didn't pick on freshman, we had a lot of pretty, spoiled girls though. And as for Mr. Michael Hall's nerd, he's writing this blog, kid.

Michael Jackson and Madonna weren't that big in our school. We all owned Thriller (even people who didn't like pop music owned Thriller! And it still is a great album!!!!) But a lot liked the 80's alternative, The Cure, REM, Violent Femmes, etc. Hairbands were fun. Bon Jovi was H-U-G-E in our school in 87'! But it was also about classic rock, Zepplin, AC/DC, and Areosmith.

House parties were great. If we wanted beer we all went to the gas station onLarimore Rd. because they didn't check I.D.'s. It wasn't about what how we dressed, or any of that Hollywood movie B.S., it was about having a good time! Driking till the cops came then going over to the McDonald's on Parker Rd and causing havoc till 2am. We had homecoming games and dances. Some kids smoked pot, but they tried to roll them into joints, now after living up here I now realize that kids in St. Louis were probably smoking the cheapest, shittest hemp on the planet (probably wasn't even pot, just cut up Kentucky Bluegrass "aka, normal lawn grass").

The overall point is the college kids here, even in hippiville, already live the 80's lifestyle I lived. Expect for the internet, cellphones, myspace, Ipods, and jalapeno poppers. It's all about getting drunk and having a good time. Some traditions just have a timeless quality about them.

"Don't you forget about me."~ S. Minds

Tutoring

I had my first real meeting tonight for my tutoring job. It went pretty well. I was nearly nervous, but I was quite happy once I started in on the jokes (if you know me, you know "the jokes"). So not school is in full session. Jobs are at full steam and this time tomorrow I can put a wrap on week 3 of school. One small problem with the turor job is I have more students that need tutoring than I have tutors. So I need to do a big recruitment campaign next week. I need to set up a table at the place known as "The J" where the freshman, sophmores, and folks who can't cook eat their lunch. Work work work.

Also, I can't really talk about my job at the pre-school, but I notice I am such a dad! The boys listen to me more then the girls. Whenever the kids get out of line I feel like I have to have "The talk". I must try this with the college kids next time they step out of line.

On a cool note, some students said they wish I would be there teacher, and hope I live up here so I can teach their kids. Pretty much the best compliment I have ever had.

Ahhh, to end on a high note!


"Well if you want to sing out, sing out
And if you want to be free be free
'Cause there's a million things to be
You know that there are"~ C. Stevens

XM and a way to get rid of telemarketers.

To start with the later, a telemarketer called me an hour ago to pitch a time share. For years I have been coming up with all sorts of bullshit excuses, but now I have the most effective one. All I said, after they got in a few words, was "I'm a college student" and boy were they turned off by me. Now I want telemarketers to call me so I can waist THEIR time. Maybe I can read them some of my blogs so they can spend a little time trying to get me off the phone since I ain't buying shit!

Something I forgot to mention during my 10 day/10,000 mile blog. I flew United because I am trying to rack up frequent flyer miles, anyway they have XM radio. And I must say XM has the best "ad men" in the world. Every radio station has a hip little name to it (e.g. If you like early 90's rock you can go to the station called "Lucy", if your child wants to here their music you can play "Watercolors" for that Spongebob fix, etc. etc) The best one is XM's overall subject line "Join the XM nation!" Wow! I now really feel out of the loop. I've only been on myspace for 10 month, I don't have an ipod much less ivideo, itunes, or iCaptain crunch. Now I have to join the XM nation? Crap! I guess I'll just have to be a person not "i"ntouch with the rest of the 21st century for a little while longer.

Wake me up when September ends

I've been drinking, so I expect this blog to be a bit more coherent then others. Although I plan on talking about several topics.

So, regarding school, I'm just going to stick it out. I thought about dropping a class and then switching over to creative drama because I can handle 4 or 5 classes (on top of the three classes I have left) in one semester, but I've come to far to take a step back. Screw it! So I'm going forward and hope the chips fall in my favor.

So I just came from one of my Tutorial meetings. I have many, many, many students wishing to tutor, but man I had complete high school flashbacks because they were so young (I'm old, so they are young.) One girl had short blond hair with a perm, it kept reminding me of this girl I knew from my freshman year in high school, I forgot her name, but I remember she kept wanting to break into our caferteria to steal Kit Kat's. Major flashbacks!

This is turning out to be a hard semester, but I think last night I finally got a hold of my "drive". All I want is to do "The Walk" on May 12th! Everything else doesn't matter. I think it's funny that I now have some extra change in my pocket, and I'm not having the time to go out and spend it. Since my Xmas is set (Florida with Grandma), and I have no idea what to do for "Turkey Day", I might finally do the one thing I have yet to do....Spring Break! Where? I haven't a clue, but outside of the U.S.

Any suggestions?

Top Ten Time

I'm doing this just to cheer myself out of my nasty, early 70's funk. Tomorrow is a new day.

Top ten actors of all time
1. Marlon Brando
2. Alec Guiness
3. George C. Scott
4. Toshiro Mifune
5. Jack Lemmon
6. Laurence Oliver
7. Henry Fonda
8. James Cagney
9. Jack Nicholson
10. Robert Deniro

Top ten Actresses of all time
1. Katherine Hepburn
2. Bette Davis
3. Audrey Hepburn
4. Meryl Streep
5. Ingrid Bergman
6. Cate Blanchett
7. Faye Dunaway
8. Elizabeth Taylor
9. Gretta Garbo
10. Anne Bancroft

Favorite songs of all time 11-20 (Did the first ten before)
11. Add it up - Violent Femmes
12. Eight Days a Week - Beatles
13. You can't always get want you want - The Rolling Stones
14. Lithium- Nirvana
15. Train in Vain - The Clash
16. It's a Family Affair - Sly and the Family Stone
17. Act Naturally - Buck Owens
18. Stairway to Heaven - Led Zepplin (of course!)
19. Is this love - Bob Marley
20. Try - Janis Joplin

Top ten things that all these college kids (no matter how diverse.."Nerd, Jock, Stoner, etc) have in common.
1. All buy beer from the same (OVER-PRICED) liquor store.
2. Have a poster of Bob Marley, Jim Morrison, Brad Nowell, or John Lennon on there wall.
3. All are against "the system" (we will see if they still are in 10 years :)
4. At 2am, when the bars have kicked them out, or if they are really high, will all go to Don't Donuts!
5. If their home is 300 miles from school, chances are they went home for Labor day weekend.
6. They don't understand why a "Lumberjack" is our mascot when this school is overrunned my "hippies"....and I tend to agree!
7. Consider anyone over 30 old (I'm an expection because I'm a crappier speller, and better drinker!)
8. They all own frisbee's!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
9. All want to take a semester off and live out in the world.
10. All, and I do mean all, think Los Angeles is the Devil's Butt of the world.

Top 10 Guilty Pleasure TV shows that I've liked through the years(had to do it!)
1. Charles in Charge
2. Saved by the Bell
3. Just the Ten of us
4. Mailbu, CA
5. F-Troop
6. Dukes of Hazzard
7. Temptation Island
8. Brady Bunch
9. Golden Girls
10. The O.C., Bitch!

Top ten things I have cooked and eaten for myself up here.
1. Salad (I am a salad!)
2. Sandwiches
3. Rice
4. Pasta
5. Soup
6. Meatloaf (when I want to treat myself)
7. Brownies (Don't ask!)
8. Waffels
9. Fish
10. Fillet Migon (once, it was ok considering have an electric oven)

Top ten things I want to.......eh, I'm burnt out.

mad

I can think of the times I have been upset with people, and myself, the last few years. I think the "New Zealander" is the person I have been the most upset with, but that was half my fault for not seeing what was the plain truth in front of me. My boss betraying me but lying to my face pissed me off, but even there I could've just quit that job too instead of waisting a year of my life. Pretty much anytime I get mad at someone it's because I'm mad at myself. Making stupid choices, or choices I think will make me happy, but really won't. I guess, like everyone else I know, I wish for that secret pieces of happiness that does exist and will fall on our lap. Getting that dream job, meeting that right person, making enough money to live life like the media portrays us too. I get that life is real, and I get I whine a lot, but it's 99.9% of the time about dumb decisions I have made with my life. HOWEVER, for the first time I can remember I am actually mad at someone, and for once, it is not my fault.

Last year, my academic advisor and I sat down and looked at what I had to do. She assured me that all my GE's would stick. I asked her to double check. She jus assured me. (Once again, this is me doing what I do worst, and putting my trust in someone when I should just check myself. But surely a University academic advisor would not "assure" me of anything unless they were 100% correct themself.). I just learned yesterday that two of my classes from Community College are not eligble for my degree. I have a year left before I graduate, and now I'm being told that I have to tac on two more classes. I could handle a 6 class semester. I've done it twice now with positive results.

The problem is, these classes conflict with other classes I need to take next semester (aka, they over-lap time-wise). My chances of graduating this Spring just went from 99.9% to 25%. I have never felt so awful. I contacted my cloest friend up here to talk to her. She recommended I talk to the school administration directly. If things go my way, at its best, I have to do summer school one more time. My advisor, later, sent me an email saying how we had such a great talk and she thinks "I made the right decisions". (For those "in the know" I had a complete flashback to a certain Human Resource).

At worse, I' m here for another year, which isn't the end of the world, but I am at a point where I really want to make a real salary. I'm enjoying college, and the last two weeks have been full of adventures (half of which I need to put in a big butt blog!), but I think I've done all the "college" stuff I've wanted to do since I got went back for the most part. I'm ready to get back into the world (In case you thought I was going to write "It's time for me to grow up", well, you really don't know me do you!!!). Once again, I don't believe in "stupid people" but I do believe "people can be stupid". Get it?

"Christ you know it ain't easy,
You know how hard it can be.
The way things are going
They're going to crucify me." ~J. Lennon